Posts Tagged ‘WIP’

WritingBunny

Hello, my name is Angel, and I am extremely tired.

 

I keep falling behind on posting, and for that I am very sorry. I tell myself I need to write something, and then I get distracted or I’ve got a million things going on, and I get exhausted and tell myself that I’ll just do it ‘tomorrow’ – except when I get to that day finally, I put it off again. And again.

And again.

But here we are!

Obviously, being back at the day job has taken up quite a bit of my time. Add that to my trip to Chicago last weekend for my birthday (Yay, I’m now 25!), and I’ve been a very busy gal.

I had started working on a new project around the same time I started working again, but then quickly lost any and all free time that I had planned to use to write. In the process, I fell into more unhealthy habits – drinking soda again, sitting on my bum all day, eating less than healthy foods, etc – and have all around been failing at what progress I had been making in my life. As I had feared, everything else was pushed to the back burner while I worked my little fingers to the bone on things that, in the end, don’t matter to me nearly as much.

But my weekend away in Chicago made me realize something: just how badly I wanted those dreams of mine to be a reality. And I know I say that a lot. I know I kick myself into gear and then slack for whatever reason. But it doesn’t mean I don’t want to accomplish everything I’ve set out to do. This past weekend, I was surrounded by inspiration. I saw people on various levels of living out their dreams, and when I was on my flight back to reality, it sank in just how badly I wanted that for myself. No one should dread coming back to their life. But I always do. And I want that to change.

With that said, it’s time I get back to work on what matters. I’m going to get up earlier and go to bed later. I’m going to research and work and save and do everything possible to make everything possible. I’m going to work on Hail to the Geek, Baby and WanderingNerdGirl.com. And I’m NOT GOING TO PUT OFF POSTING! Once a week at least, that’s my goal. Hold me to it!

Figured I’d pop in and let you all know that I’m definitely alive, and tired, and trying harder than ever.

Let’s make things happen.

~Angel

 

I thought this was more out of reach, and honestly, there is still a lot of work to go because I need to do a read-through and have some Beta Readers take a look at it and make any necessary corrections… BUT —

MY WORK IN PROGRESS IS DONE! THE REVISION IS COMPLETE! I JUST NEED TO FIX THINGS AND NOT REWRITE THE WHOLE THING!

cyberdance

It’s such a relief to know I just have polishing left. I’ve worked on this book for forever now it seems, so I’m ecstatic to finally have it at a place I’m much more satisfied with and can tweak instead of completely rewrite.

The light at the end of the tunnel is there. I’m not that far off from queries – which are scary and exhilarating at the same time.

But I’m there guys. I can see the finish line.

~Angel

In one sentence is the spark of a story. Ignite.

 My apologies for not posting quite as much, but it can be blamed on something very, very good: I have been a writing fiend. Despite work. Despite sickness and brain fog and appointments. Despite everything.

I am writing. A lot.

What was a goal of managing one chapter or one short story to Brittaney every Thursday, has now grown into being three or four chapters, on top of a short story. Or, like I currently am at:  seven chapters. SEVEN CHAPTERS IN LESS THAN A WEEK! That’s with work, sickness, nieces, appointments… And Kingdom Hearts and Doctor Who. All those distractions, and yet here I go, writing writing writing.

I give a lot of that credit to Brittaney for motivating me.

TEAMWORK!

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BCAP2

BCAP3

Have I ever mentioned how much I adore Bryan Cranston and Aaron Paul? Because I do.

Annnnnway. Consider the inspirational spark ignited. I am getting through this revision like I should be, and don’t plan on stopping there. I hope to not only participate in NaNoWriMo again this year, but actually WIN and get that 50,000 words written. And then, the biggest step of all – the manuscript I am currently revising will be going to agents hopefully by February.

It is time I do what I am supposed to do: write.

~Angel

So here we go with another lovely little general update about the various projects and things going on:

Writing: I know I need to be working on BM, the current work-in-progress I’ve been trying to get polished for agent querying. But it’s in a state of chaos, since I was working on it before, during, and AFTER the 2012 Sjogren’s flare of Doom. I think that much mixed together honestly really, really intimidates me. That’s a strange way to put it, I guess. But it’s the best way I can describe it. I’m just uncomfortable with so many variations while I’m still struggling to get my groove back.

MassiveInsecurity

So, when the uncontrollable urge to start writing again on an old manuscript that I tried to get published in 2008/2009, which we shall refer to here as B.O.E., I gave it some serious thought. Did I really want to ruin a book I adored with my crappy Sjogrens brain? I went ahead and started a read through and realized — Sjogrens or not, I’ve grown as a writer since then. I could see glaring mistakes that I either overlooked or was too afraid to dump. I think, as unusual as it sounds, that working on a rewrite for B.O.E. could actually reboot my brain to pre-Sjogrens Doom Flare. Maybe not everything will work right, and maybe not all the time. But it got some gears turning that had started getting rusty. We’ll see how this works out.

Art: To make up for the fact I haven’t always felt up to my little sketch-a-day plan, I have started working on bigger and more time consuming projects as a way to take regaining my skills to a bigger level. I still want to keep practicing a little sketch every day, but from time to time I don’t mind pumping out some bigger work. Some of which I would really like to try to sell, eventually.

Photography: I haven’t done an actual shoot that I’ve wanted to for some time. I’ve done a few for other people, but none that are actual projects of my own. I have a shoot hopefully on Sunday, so let’s see if that kicks off photo shoot season properly. I’ve had a lot of ideas, and not a lot of time or energy. I have started taking online classes for photography, and probably more subjects soon enough. I’m pretty excited.

Adventures: I’m going through travel withdrawals. I’m staring at my luggage and wishing it was packed up and going with me somewhere. And while I do have at least two trips left this year, that really seems like it isn’t enough. I need to leave. Especially with the fact I’m used to leaving for Orlando in May or June from the last two years. My body is convinced we’re supposed to be leaving. Sorry, body. Not yet.

However, I’m still working hard to save up for my big trip with friends next year. I’m hoping it all works out, we get our ticket and hotel money together, and we can pull this off. *crosses fingers*

 

Well, that’s about it for now. I’ll have another post about the various other things going on soon enough, and will eventually get around to posting about all the appointments lately. I just haven’t been ready to tackle the health post, yet.

~Angel

I’ve been invited to participate in a blog tour about the writing process. It was started by Maya Rock www.maya-rock.com. I was invited fellow writer and Facebook friend, Megan Bostic http://meganbostic.blogspot.com

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1) What am I working on?

Oh, you know. Everything. Anything. Nothing.

Honestly, I’ve been splitting my time between edits on the book I’d like to query – let’s nickname it BM, shall we? – as well as two in-progress stories, one of which isn’t much more than an idea still being fleshed out. I normally prefer to actively work on one at a time, but with my Sjogren’s brain, I can only do so much. It’s all over the place, I’m all over the place. It’s a mess in here. *taps forehead*

I’ve also been trying to have more practice at writing in general, specifically trying to get out of my fictional comfort zone. I took a class last semester called “Creative Nonfiction” which I honestly thought would become my breaking point to make me realize I’m a joke of a writer and should give up while I’m ahead. Turns out, I was wrong, and did fairly well in the class. I ended up passing with Honors, my extra Honors project being paper over Sjogren’s Syndrome and my journey with it. My instructor loved it. I was amazed I made it. But it really gave me a much needed boost. I thrive in classes like that, even when I’m doubting myself.

So, to gain more practice, I’ve been writing for various things. There was, of course, interviews and reviews for A Thousand Lives Reviews. But I haven’t been able to log into that blog for some time now, and that’s a bit disappointing. I’ve also been a Staff Writer for Ax Wound, which is a giant honor to me, and I’m proud of my work there.

And, oddly, if I could get around to having more time for it… I think I’d love getting back into FanFiction.

2)How does my work differ from others of its genre?

This is a weird question to me. Obviously I think it stands out because, well… It’s MINE. My work, my voice, my way of perceiving and regurgitating this grand adventure we call Life. Was that a bit much? Oh well. The point is, what I really see as the difference is that it’s my way of doing things, my voice shouting into the void.

3)Why do I write what I do?

I write what I do because that’s what I like to read about. Mostly, it’s just because some idea pops up in my skull one day, and off I go scribbling things down until there is something worth fleshing out. Sometimes it’s a thought, or an image, or just something playing out in my head like a memory. I write what I do because it’s just what the Muse is throwing at me. She pokes and prods at my brain until I give in and give her what she wants.

But mostly, I write because there is something within me that needs to come out, and so I release it back out into the world with words or paint or photos until I can think clearly again. That’s why I write what I do. That’s why I spent a lot of time writing strictly horror – because I had a festering darkness that needed to come out. Now I just want to prance around La-La Land. And that’s just fine.

4)How does your writing process work?

Oh, you know:

TwirlPencil

Actually, in all reality, my writing process is simple. I just sit down and let the words come. I’d like to say I have that stereotyped image of me sitting in Starbucks with my laptop, sipping on some coffee and hammering out a bestseller. But that’s not how it works for me because a) I hate coffee, and b) I’m not a Café Writer. Writing is a very solo experience to me. I like to be alone with my headphones on. Usually I write at my desk or at the dining room table. Occasionally, I sit outside on really nice days, especially if I’m working on something that has to do with my characters being outside. I’ve also been known to write at specific tables outside of the college between classes, as well as in the library at one of the private cubicle things.

Wherever I am, I let the words come. If it’s a specific project, I read over where I left off, maybe glance through notes etc. If I’m just free writing for the sake of getting an idea or scene out, I just let whatever needs to be written down come out. I typically work off of paper initially, or at least for a good portion of whatever I’m working on. It’s not too common that I write everything out on a computer. Not that I don’t like to, I just enjoy handwriting everything first for whatever odd reason. I have notebooks upon notebooks of work.

Which leads me to this: I’m a Notebook Writer (there are various types of writers in my mind), which essentially means I carry a notebook everywhere at all times, or at least make sure I have a pen. For example, the instance of being so inspired in New Orleans, I was scribbling thoughts on top of a pizza box as I walked down Royal street. Wherever I travel, I take a notebook of some form with me. I keep a notebook in my purse at all times, to fill with quotes or dialogue or ideas or whatever I need to jot down.

But it’s all part of my process as a writer. Mainly, I’m a slave to the ideas and the muse. I’m also a big fan of music while I write. I especially like making soundtracks based off of music that I feel matches the overall theme or even some specific scenes for whatever I’m writing.

 

So, there you have it – My Writing Process. Now, here’s where I’m SUPPOSED to tag someone else. I tagged my friend Alesha, but I don’t know that she’ll have time to post one… so, we shall see. Otherwise, I’m a partial failure. 😀

~Angel

BeAWriter

So, some of you may already be aware of the fact I had my very first rheumatology appointment on Tuesday. I’ve been so worn out, Ipromise haven’t had the chance to update you. To sum it up fairly simply:

Lots and lots of tests. Twenty tubes of blood drawn. Trying to rule out lots of things: fibromyalgia, Chronic Fatigue, Lupus, horrible “c” word which shall not be named, etc. So far, from the lab work I’ve seen and my regular doctor looked at, I’m coming up positive for some sort of connective tissue disease. But what I’m going to end up with as a diagnoses is really up in the air still. I have a follow-up the 26th to go over my labs and see what the next steps will be, or if she has any answers for me.

And while I’m scared to death it’s going to be something life-altering, no cure, or fatal – I am very relieved about something: I’m not crazy. Well, not about this (ha.)

I have PROOF of something being wrong with these test results. There is something here that shows I’m not lying, and it isn’t all in my head. The Mysterious Sickness of Doom may have a NAME. You have no idea the relief that brings me.

Only now I have to keep from worrying myself to death that it’s something that’ll take me out sooner rather than later.

In other news, I’m slowly but surely getting through the revisions on my WIP. My Beta reader is keeping me motivated by taking on a chapter at a time, and I have to keep up by getting these chapters ready. So far, so good. And really, I’ve been needing this outlet to make me relax with the large amount of stress hitting me in the face. Keep Calm and Write Something. It’s that simple.

Anyway, I’m off. Much to do.

~Angel

I’m afraid because I know I cannot fight forever.

Between stress and sickness, I’m starting to meet my match. Mortality is slapping in the face and reminding me of just what I stated above: I cannot fight forever. I am a strong individual, but I cannot hold up to constant attempts to drag me down. Nobody can. Eventually, something has to give. I will crumble and break, and at this rate, it will be sooner rather than later.

I ended up staying home from work today. Which is a big deal, really, when you consider the fact that I’ve been working crazy hours even when I’ve had fevers, blood gushing out of my ear canal, been vomiting my guys out, and been in so much pain I could barely move – BUT STILL CONTINUED WORKING. But between stress and being miserable and knowing I’d probably die if I attempted to go in… Yeah. It was a day I had to choose to put health first. Which sort of bit me in the ass, and I’m sure I’ll have to pay for it tomorrow. But you know what? I don’t care. Not anymore.

I’m learning to live my life a different way, slowly but surely. I have to make choices based on what’s best for me in the end, and it’s gotten very difficult to figure out exactly what IS best for me. What should my priorities be? What needs to be put first? I cannot do everything, not like I used to.

It sounds like a change of subject, but it really isn’t – but there is a song from WICKED called “Defying Gravity” that I’ve fallen in love with. It’s hard to explain without ruining part of WICKED for anyone who hasn’t seen it, but it’s basically a very self-empowering song, where Elphaba makes her choice to live by what she deems right and not doing what she’s told anymore, even if it’s scary to make that choice. I want to get a tattoo based off this song, I love it so much. I’m not going to get into it very much right now, because I plan to do a post on it alone in the coming weeks.

The point is, this song is my anthem. This song is giving me the boost I need to make the choices I must. Which includes my decision to stop letting excuses stop me from chasing my dreams. I may not be able to do as much as I could before, but even baby steps will be better than nothing. So, little by little, every day, I’ve been trying to accomplish at least a little something that has nothing to do with the day job or house work or adult responsibilities etc. Be it writing, even just a little bit, or reading, or booking shoots, or editing pictures I’m behind on. Or, like today, posting a blog entry and sitting and editing my manuscript to get it ready for beta readers. Getting myself steps closer to achieving a dream. And it feels good. Damn good.

I’ve spent the most part of my day curled up in bed, in and out of a feverish daze, either crying from stress or trying to sleep. Until I finally got tired of being whiney about everything that was wrong and decided to crack open the old laptop, pull up my Work In Progress and my notes on it, and start editing once more. You know what? It feels amazing. I feel amazing. Because for that long, I can zone out of this world and be in that one. I can leave behind the stress of this world and the physical pain and discomfort, and just work on what makes me happy. The distraction is good for me. I’ve missed my old friend Writing. My cure for the bad things, even now.

Just goes to show I should follow my own advice: Keep Calm and Write Something.

Well, time to jump back into my writerly LaLa Land. 🙂

~Angel