“The fire’s only half dead, how many angels can you fit on a match head?”
Trying, trying, trying… Even though everything seems to keep falling apart, even though every time I think I have one problem out of the way, I turn around and have six more problems on top of the previous problems. Mounting stress. Worry, concern, anxiety. Eating me up. Making me nuts. Killing the passion, the drive, the fire that used to burn so bright inside of me. I wish I could just stop and focus again. I used to do so well, used to get so much done. But I never have time to shoot or draw or paint or, most importantly – write. I NEED to write. I need to shoot. I need to focus. But I’ve been working too much, stressing too much, hurting too much..
“I’m feeling like I’m half dead.”
Mysterious Sickness of Doom just won’t go away. I just can’t seem to make myself feel any better, then find out more things are wrong. More procedures, more doctors, more test. I’m tired of it all. I just want to be better again. I want to go home from work and not feel like I’m going to die because my body hurts too much.
“I’d tell you the truth but I don’t wanna upset you friend.
I’d tell you “Go to hell” but Satan wouldn’t let you in.
He’d say that you’re an evil man amongst evil men,
And when you need a friend you can seek him then.”
I’m tired of the bad guy winning lately. Tired of people destroying my chances to move forward. Not just me bitching that someone else is holding me back – I mean LITERALLY, people getting themselves into some huge mess and somehow dragging me into said mess. It’s never ending. And it pulls some domino effect stuff on the rest of my life, leaving me lost on what to do next when I was so sure I had a game plan in mind.
In other news…
My friend Skylar, aka the FABULOUS model Little Red ( Go like her on Facebook!), started living with me this week, and we’re officially moving her stuff tomorrow with the help of our mutual friend (and my bestie) Brittaney – aka other fab model, Daisy Von Doom ( Annnnd go like her on Facebook as well). Also, we’re redoing my bathroom. Well, starting on it at least. So yeah. Shit is craaazy right now.
More news, hopefully less whiney, later.
~Angel
Our plates were pretty sweeeeet too.
Misadventures of a Misfit 