Posts Tagged ‘writers life for me’

elephant-rocks

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, and usually this time of year, I like to make a stereotypical post about things I’m thankful for. So here’s a list of what I’m thankful for, or just brings me joy right now (in no real order):

Movie nights with someone you love.

My Batman collection. 

My nieces. 

Fur babies. 

Feeling inspired. 

Productive nights of insomnia. 

Feeling accomplished. 

Qdoba nacho dates with my  best friend. 

The hunt for collection things.

Long calls with your favorite person.

Clear nights with the moon and stars shining bright.

Hoodie weather.

Nature walks / Hikes.

Road trips with good company and good music.

The exhilaration on your favorite rides.

Doing something kind for someone else, and knowing they appreciated it. 

Knowing this is the first December in a few years I don’t have a surgery scheduled.

The catalyst of meeting Kevin Smith one year ago. 

Filling up a box of comics.

The excitement of somewhere new.

Being so happy that I can’t stop the big, dorky grins. 

Painting with music blaring days. 

Adventure. 

Chinese food. 

Supporting the dreams and projects of others.

The Bat Force / Bat Force Radio while working on my collection. 

Naps.

My fandoms.

People equally passionate about the same things I am.

Good memories.

Cards Against Humanity nights. 

My closest friends.

My BEST friend.

Everything about a certain someone. 

There are many, many other things I could list. But these were the first things to come to mind today, and that was the most important part of this to me: the RIGHT NOW.

I hope everyone has a great week, and if you’re celebrating – a great Thanksgiving.

-Angel

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We used to play pretend, give each other different names,
We would build a rocket ship and then we’d fly it far away,
Used to dream of outer space but now they’re laughing at our face,
Saying, “wake up, you need to make money.”

Whenever I travel and find myself inspired on my journey, it does two things. Obviously, one thing it does is strike me with a desire to create and work harder. But an unfortunate counter to that inspiration, is a terrible reminder in the back of my mind, gnawing at me despite how desperately I try to block it out, that I am not where I want to be in life, and that in itself can kill the positive aspects of travel.

This is my post-travel depression. Every time I come home, I don’t feel at home. I feel lost. It’s like I come back to normal life, and I don’t remember who I am. I lose the connection I had to my happiest self, and during this disconnection, I return to the girl I have to be. The girl putting everyone and everything else first.

Granted, I have continued working on this problem, as promised. This has helped my stress not be as stressful. But I’m still a little off.

But, I have to continue forward. I’m still giving myself the freedom to love what I love. To enjoy the things that spark my creativity and make me want to do more. It’s been interesting seeing how helpful reintegrating horror back in as a regular staple has been. By the time I got to Halloween Horror Nights at Universal last Friday, I was ready to take in everything around me and not only enjoy it for what it was, but to use it as a source of inspiration. I felt excited and happy and ready to create.

Now I’m back to real life, and I’m trying to hold on to the motivation. I started doodling and sketching last night. I want to write when I get a chance. I’m trying to work on ideas for some different projects. I’ve been planning out posts for Wandering NerdGirl based off of my trip. I can do this. I know I can. I can work hard and get somewhere.

dontgiveup

Let’s see what I can do now, shall we?

~Angel

I use my veins to create the color I paint from
Delve into something ’til my
heart becomes my paint brush

Dream

I’ve mentioned this roughly four trillion times by now, I’m sure – My unspeakable desire to break free of this rut I’m in and be back to my normal life of dream chasing (though you can hardly call me ‘normal’… maybe just back to my old self.) Because I am not a desk job person. I am not an office monkey. To be honest, my work doesn’t make me happy anymore, it doesn’t pertain to my future, and it doesn’t help whatsoever with the Mysterious Sickness of Doom.

So I stare into this paper instead of sitting at a cubicle
Take all ugly shit inside and try to make it beautiful

So, I declare it time to get my ass into gear. For real. Not just hoping I can and against my will it doesn’t work out. No. Not this time. This time, I am giving myself a set amount of time for these revisions, set amount of time to get it to my Beta reader, set amount of time to review it once again. I’m giving myself oh-so-long to work on something different to clear my mind of this story so I can look at it with fresh eyes. But mark my words. I’m getting something accomplished this year. I’m getting my query letters to agents out before 2013 is over with. I’m done waiting. I’m done letting everything else take priority over what I really want out of this life. If the Day Job wants to stand in the way, then… I guess it’ll have to go for now.

Because it is time I get back to Angel Young – the writer. Not Angel Young, the office monkey.

~Angel