Posts Tagged ‘diagnosis’

makenicethingsI could easily admit Sjogren’s Syndrome when I was diagnosed. I was scared, but I could easily say that yes, I have it. And Fibromyalgia didn’t scare or surprise me, mainly just irritates me.
The new specialist I’ve been seeing about my ovaries diagnosed me with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. It’s not something I scream from the rooftop, but I can still admit it.
But I can’t deny the one disease, of all diseases, I have dreaded being told I have. Because Thursday, it snuck up on me, in blood work I never imagined it appearing on. Diabetes.
Mind you, I have not been a diabetic. I have my blood drawn and checked a bizarre amount. I just had it checked right before my dental stuff. But there it was, plain as day, looking back at me. And when the nephrologist that had drawn the labs called me, I hoped he would say it was a fluke. But nope. It’s all mine. A new diagnosis.
And I don’t like it.
I literally fought the diagnosis, denying that it could honestly be happening. But today, I can’t deny it anymore. I started to feel horrible at work, and sure enough, when we checked my blood sugar, it was elevated. Very elevated.
The best guess anyone has as to why I have had normal blood sugars, and now not normal blood sugars, is a combination of horrible genes and my last steroid treatment being such a high dose so many times a day, that it pretty much caused a steroid induced diabetes.
Basically: The medicine to help the rest of me not be sick, woke up another sickness. (Which, I must say, is bullshit. Stupid body.)

But, why am I throwing all this out there? Because I am ashamed. And I shouldn’t be. I don’t want to be. I’m posting this because I need love and support to get me through it, and I won’t have any of that if I pretend I don’t have it.

Diabetes is a disease that, in both Type 1 and Type 2, is frequently misconstrued by the media and society in general as something to be embarrassed of. People suddenly think it gives them a license to be an asshole to you, because you obviously “did it to yourself.”

Diabetes is an autoimmune disease. So, why don’t I want to treat it like Sjogren’s, where I can just as easily say that I have Diabetes as I do with Sjogrens?

I don’t want to perpetuate this idea that I need to be ashamed.

And I am going to fight like hell to turn this mess around, not so people don’t judge me: but so that I can live this fabulous, adventurous life I have dreamed of.

 

~Angel

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We’ve been playing a game of “What the hell is wrong with me?” for about a year and a half. And now, we finally have some names to throw out there:ImagineSjogrens

Last appointment, I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia. We discussed the possibility that Lupus is developing. Today I was diagnosed with early stage Sjogren’s.

This is a disease that usually hits menopause age women and older, though it can hit someone my age. It’s just pretty rare. So, if and when I ever have children, I’ll need a high risk OB.

There are ways of managing Sjogren’s to make it more comfortable, but there are no medications specifically for it and no cure. I’m also at risk of serious complications, the big one being Lymphoma. So I have to be on high alert for those symptoms. And Sjogren’s can play brother and sister with Lupus, so we’re predicting that is in the process of possibly developing as well.

Mostly, I’m just dumbfounded that there’s not just ONE name for what’s wrong with me. There’s a few. The biggest relief is that I’m NOT CRAZY. I have proof of something being wrong with me. Something that can be explained.

Now, to just plan how to make these life alterations so I can cope a bit better.

More later,

Angel.