Misadventures of a Misfit

One of the lines from The Avengers that really struck me was the quote from Black Widow:

“I’ve got red on my ledger; I’d like to wipe it out.”

It’s sort of a quiet motto to how I live my life. Granted, I haven’t committed the same sort of acts that she has, but I have red in my ledger (so to speak) all the same. There are some things in my life that are going to haunt me forever, and all I can really to is try to make up for them with everything else I do. A better way to explain it maybe is how Katniss view “owing” people in the Hunger Games books – that if someone does something for you, you owe them, even if they want nothing in return. You still feel like you OWE them.

I guess some of mine comes from when my best friend, Eric, died two months before my 15th birthday. The 7 year anniversary (terrible word for it, isn’t it?) is coming up in almost exactly a month, so it’s haunting me as it is. Life seems to drain from you when a death hangs onto you like that – I’m alive, he isn’t. I’m alive, seeing movies and having birthdays and falling in love and all that…  But there’s other reasons, too.

Anyway:

Heading out for Orlando at 5am in the morning. I shall post as I can, lovelies.

~Angel